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Sexual Orientation Guidance
Let me begin by stating my firm belief that homosexuality, bisexuality and Trans identities and orientations are perfectly normal for those who are gay, bi or Trans and that there is absolutely nothing wrong with them. As with heterosexuality, in and of themselves they are morally neutral. They most certainly are not sicknesses, and so need no healing. Nothing is broken and nothing therefore really needs fixing. I am also convinced that the right to be who you are - and this includes the right to be who you are sexually - is amongst the most fundamental and inalienable of human rights. Absolutely no-one has the right to take this away from any human being.
Problems can arise, however, when the individual has difficulty coming to terms with a sexuality that veers from that of the majority. Often these difficulties reside, for whatever reason, in the individual him or herself, and sometimes they arise in those who care about that individual -- parents, family, partners and friends, for example.
In the process of coming to terms with a different sexual orientation, feelings such as guilt, shame, depression, loss and confusion may be experienced and with these feelings may come anger - often inner-directed - together with a sense of low self-esteem and an attendant lack of self-confidence.
None of this is merited. None of this is an essential and useful response to a different sexual orientation. We live, after all, in a society full of difference and we rightly celebrate that difference. Why then shouldn't we celebrate differences in sexuality? If you are having difficulty coming to terms with your sexual orientation or with the orientation of someone you care about, perhaps you would benefit from talking things over and working with a professional who has profound knowledge, understanding and insight in this area.
Peter Field is Consultant Psychotherapist with Terrence Higgins Trust in the Midlands.
Call Peter now on 0121 698 8505 and get the help you need to deal with difficulties and issues concerning sexual orientation.
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